Monday, 20 September 2010
Concerns about an open marriage
I'm rather mixed up about where to go in my relationship, not in a bad way but it
is on my mind. I have encouraged sandy to play with others if she wants to, and she has begun to, at least a little. I am very much her sub, she controls me, my heart my sexuality and my time if she wants it. She enjoys having her way when it suits her, and loves being sexually dominant. So her playing away feels to me like a cuckold dynamic, which is fine.
But I am a switch and my dominant side is growing the more submissive I am at home, as a result she has allowed me to find a sub. This in itself is OK too, but does not sit well with the cuckold dynamic in my head. It feels like a more classic open marriage.
I know this sounds like worrying about labels but its not, I'm confused about what emotional and sexual dynamic might come about. I don't want to lose the warm love of her dominance which has made us both a much happier couple. She certainty doesn't either.
This is probably worrying needlessly, a friend who knows more about these things than I has suggested that we should just go with the flow. So that's what I will do, though if it become a choice between losing my feelings of submission to sandy by playing away myself, or stopping my own outside play I will choose the latter. This dynamic has done us as a couple too much good to lose it.
Incidentally for those who are wondering, there is no chance of letting my Dom side out on Sandy, she has made that very clear. Lol!