Tuesday, 5 October 2010

I am sick

I have a nasty bitch of a cold. I've been layed out for three days. I hate it, want a body transplant, and on top of that feel like I'm letting my best friend and mistress down by not helping her enough. Sandy of course says I'm being silly, I'm clearly not well. She is right but emotionally I've been teaching myself to care for her at all times. That doesn't just turn off because of illness.

One conversation in passing is worth a mention. A few weeks back when we had a vanilla break we made love, or fucked a few times. I asked her if she was missing it. She said she was a bit. This surprised me as she very rarely misses penetrative sex. So I asked (rather hopefully) if she wanted more of it, and she basically said yes but not with me. I assumed she was joking but then out of interest asked what she missed about it. It seems it's not the emotional intimacy (which is why I value it) it's simply the sensation she is missing. I guessed then that she meant it about wanting a fuck, but with her new guy rather than me, and she confirmed that.

We laughed about it, she felt a touch uncomfortable and pointed out it's just for now, it's a fun game. I smiled, since I know that already, but enjoyed teasing her about it nonetheless.

Oh and we've started occasionally calling him her boyfriend. It's meant mostly in irony, mostly but not entirely. She spends a lot of time chatting or texting in a rough simulacrum of a new relationship. It's not of course, before you get worrying. In fact we both find ourselves closer to each other than before. But it's similar enough to warrant the label.

1 comment:

S said...

Sounds like this is a big step, calling him her "boyfriend." Each new step has to bring a new sense of thrill and a new feeling of excitement. I can't believe that you can only come once a week. That must be torturous.