Thursday, 16 July 2009
Meta blogging
I thought long and hard about wether to post this. Somehow it seems a little too head up own arse to write a blog post about blogging, but then after at least 5 seconds of navel contemplation I thought, go for it, live a little.
The question is this, why do some posts get comments and not others. I have noticed this on many blogs including my own. Sometimes a truly dull post gets someone's attention. Other times what you think is interesting gets no comments. I have seen on occasion some pretty stunning posts with no comments at all (not my own).
This thought was triggered this time by my post about tickling. Its not something I see much written about at all. As such I thought it would get a comment or two, probably of the love it or hate it variety.
Some of Roo-Roo's posts, such as this had no comments! In fact I often see posts of his that I think should have had a full blown conversation on the back of them, but natch, or almost.
Then it all turns on its head and a long thread starts up discussing the relative merits of pink or black leather in the bdsm scene. Actually on second thought that could be quite interesting :)
So there we have it, no sex in this post, sorry people.
On a different note my family are away for almost two weeks. Anyone wanna go clubbing?
Friday, 15 May 2009
Coming out unexpectedly.
Anyway I got in to work having paused the sound. Sat down, unplugged my headphones, which triggered the podcast to start playing again, only this time through the internal speaker of my handheld. Loud.
Never seen someone reach for a volume control so fast! Luckily it was on one of the few innocent bits. Phew!
M
Tuesday, 31 March 2009
I Hate High School Musical
It espouses some of the worst, most superficial aspects of American culture, holding them up as the be all and end all of aspiration.
Troy - the rugged individualist, heart in the right place, macho, fighting the odds by himself.
Whats wrong with this picture? He isnt all man, he isnt getting there all by himself, he isnt doing it against all odds. He is about as lucky as a human being on this planet in 2009 can be. Comfortably off, talented in everything he turns his hand to, popular, oh and good looking as well.
Gabrielle - the simpering idiot. Supposedly smart but all she ever does is act pretty and simper at Troy. Whats wrong here? Woman, defined by man, defined by looks, must hide intelligence and act like a fluffy bunny rabbit to be accepted in society. Feh.
Kelsi - Smart, Geeky. In Jellyfish's own words as I cant say it better... Kelsi's acceptance by the group takes the form of some jock taking away her hat and getting her to shoot the basketball, followed by a prettifying makeover avec stupid one-strap Supre top and sequinned belt.
Not to mention the overwhelming obsession with teen relationships without even a hint of physical intimacy (cos that would be wrong)! Yes I remember Britney gyrating around sexually in a schoolgirl uniform or catsuit, while it was claimed in all seriousness that she was a good christian 'virgin'. Talk about double standards!
I must have watched the first two a hundred times (yes I have young kids), and I just cant describe the trivial horror of it. As you can see when I try I sound pompous and too serious, but I know someone who can do a much better job. I nearly peed myself reading this :) Eloquently said!
Friday, 13 March 2009
Plusses and Minuses
On the minus side - Hormones, bit of a mild cold, another rejected job application, missing adult company.
On the plus side, lots of time at home with kids at a lovely age, My job covers us enough to not worry too much, food on the table, roof over our heads and good health.
It shouldnt be a contest should it. There are so many people so badly off in the world, that I sometimes despair at our 'humanity'. We are lucky. Yet we cant help being who we are, and after 8 months of looking for a job it is not surprising that she feels low some days. Luckily she is an incredibly resilient woman, more so than i am (resilient that is, i am not a woman, at least not on the weekdays ;) ). Looking for a part time job, let alone one which pays enough to cover childcare is extremely hard in a bull market, but in these economic times its nearly impossible. She keeps getting so close but not quite. i am sure it will come, and in the meantime she gets lots of hugs from me and the kids. Some of her friends have the opposite problem, working so much they never see their kids.
So on balance all is well with us, this moment will pass, by sunday I predict, at the latest.
Oh yes, tomorrow we are out at a 70s party. Probably just what she needs. One Freddy Mercury (complete with skinny girls jeans and adidas trainers), and one electric blue catsuited disco diva coming up. Might post pics if I can.
Verbal diarrhoea over. Spluuuurge.

Sunday, 14 December 2008
What use a cunning linguist?
What am I babbling [sic] about you ask?
Well I love to give oral, I could spend hours between a girls legs, the act is pleasure enough, I don't need the favor returned... Analingus too. I have even gone down on a man and enjoyed it.
Honestly whats not to love. Face enveloped in soft warmth, touch, taste, sight, smell, senses overwhelmed in every way. Hearing the sounds of your lover moaning, feeling them writhing, intimately aware of every peak and crest of pleasure. Pulling lips with lips, licking slowly, teasing slowly, stabbing musk in darkened folds. Hair pulled and head mashed as her body arches in guttural desperate release.
But...
My wife doesnt like it at all! Not in the slightest. It just does nothing for her. We have tried often enough in all sorts of ways. Perhaps 2-3 times a year it hits the spot but even then only for a short while. She likes fingers, cocks, toys and even whips, but not tongues down there.
Whats a man to do? :)
Friday, 14 November 2008
Follow my ramblings automatically
Monday, 3 November 2008
An ode to circumcision!
1 It looks gooood, so much better than a random flap of excess skin
2 It lets the head of my cock grow much much more when I am at my hardest, this looks cool. More importantly it grows most when I am close to cumming, usually this is when my wife is also close to cumming and the growth can push her over the edge. A lovely way to have a simultaneous orgasms.
3 It feels velvety and smooth
4 It tastes so much better (according to my wife, I wish I was that bendy!) than an uncircumcised penis, even if the owner keeps it clean. She has had quite a number to choose from so I believe her! Hence I get much more oral than I would otherwise have done.
5 It works better in a chastity device (easier to keep clean)
6 It looks great with a piercing (see this coming thursdays HNT)
and last but far from least, the reason I originally had it done
7 It doesnt hurt when having sex!
That brings me nicely to the reasons why, and the story about when I had it done. I have, it turns out, always had a tight foreskin. It was being monitored when I was a kid but it was never tight enough for the doctors to warrant removing it. I dont think they should have been so cautious, and I also think they should have told me what they were monitoring and what the consequences I should watch out for were as an adult. At such a young age I had no idea what the problem was. So as I grew into my teens my penis (which when hard has a big head) never got to full hardness, ever. When it approached I would become very uncomfortable and my erection would soften (or at least not harden further). As a result I spent years wondering if there was something wrong, it lowered my confidence in my sexual ability, and the few times I had sex it failed completely to be pleasurable. It was just plain uncomfortable. It was this which eventually (age 22) led me to realise there may be a physical rather than psychological problem and talk to a doc. They took one look, heard my description of sex and immediately said remove it. It was a huge relief to know what the problem was. The difference afterwards was incredible, sex was much more pleasurable, my penis got much harder and a bit larger because of the lack of discomfort, and for the first time sex worked. I consider I was a virgin until I was 23 because that is when I first had sex. Everything before it was some pale shadow of what it should have been. My confidence grew, but I think it is still less than it should have been.
The story of how it happened still amuses me (and turns me on)... At the time I was a student living in a house with 4 doctors, all female, and all cute. One was a part time call girl and had a habit of flouncing into my room at 2am to tell me about her night. Two of them were extremely very very cute (truth is I was infatuated with both), both wore holdups never tights (pantyhose), both wandered around the house in their underwear on a regular basis, and both also had a habit of flouncing into my room or even bed for late night TV. I realise this sounds like a silly playboy fantasy but believe me it isnt, if it were the late night TV session would have ended in a threesome, but that only ever happened in my dreams:) So during this year I had the chop. I went into hospital in the morning, had a tiny bit of general anaesthetic and woke up 20 minutes later thinking no time had passed. Looked under the cover wondering why they hadnt operated and saw a very bandaged penis. Walked home a couple of hours later, slowly.
Over the next 6 weeks I discovered that...
1 I am a man with a very high sex drive
2 I am unable to pleasure myself for at least 6 weeks
3 That I am in no pain except when I get erect when it hurts a lot
4 That the days are fine but the nights are hard, literally, and then sore. I didnt sleep so well :)
5 That my flatmates continued to wander around in their underwear and flounce into my bedroom
6 That without a good wank at least 3 times a day it became a huge tease having them around.
Lets just say that when the pain was bearable I had a wonderful explosive orgasm or seven. I wonder if this is where my love of Tease and Denial originated?
My son (now three) also has this problem. The doctors are unwilling to do anything this early on and want to monitor it. Unsurprisingly I am wary of this given the problems it caused me. The least I will do is talk to him early on about the problems to look out for when he grows up. I wonder how many 14-15 year olds when going through puberty have the confidence to discuss such a personal matter. Part of me wants to be proactive and have him circumcised, and part of me wonders whether the docs are right to be cautious. I certainly dont want him to have the problems I had though!
Friday, 10 October 2008
It's been a while...
In the meantime please remember that sex is free and keeps you fit too :)
I have not had much inclination to play recently, we have mostly made love, the old fashioned way. Its what I needed to be honest, and its been wonderful. Just like when we met 15 years ago, except not seven times a day, ha. Sweet, heart warming, calming, my wife and lover has proved to be a real haven, a sign of how far she and I have come over the last few years!
Having said that we have a date this weekend and she has indicated a strong desire to spank me, yum. I agreed of course, as long as its long and hard enough to hurt real good and give me a nice endorphin rush after :)
Until then...
Saturday, 9 August 2008
Bad porn
You know the kind, angry noises that should sound like lust, angry faces that should look like a person close to cumming, excessive make up that goes beyond slutty and looks more like Jacqueline Stallone, non-stop horndog noises that are so overdone (nobody moans like that)... Why of why?
Mostly they look like very angry women who arent turned on at all.
Why do people make it, and others buy it, its rubbish. I would rather be slapped with a wet fish! It makes the red faced german moustache man and bad music stuff from the 70s look really good! At least the women looked and acted natural.
MyKey
Friday, 8 August 2008
Iphone shocker!
So far I havent succeeded in getting company emails. Thats kind of a problem. Not quite the blackberry killer yet.
I also cant help wonder how long it will be before that screen is scratched to buggery!
Maybe I should post a picture of my cuter half taken with the phone, if you all beg nicely...
Monday, 21 July 2008
What classes as sex?
When she first told me that figure I assumed she meant that she had had sex with 14 men, but no, that's only the guys she has fucked. She has as she puts it 'squirmed' with a number more. This includes oral, fondling and cumming apparently. In my book that counts as sex no? I always put it down to her being weird but after polling a few female friends I discovered that more than half agree that its only sex if there is penetration! Huh :)
So from now on if I fool around with another woman but don't fuck her its ok cos its not sex, hahah. Somehow when i said that my wife didn't agree:)
Thursday, 3 July 2008
Soho is world renowned
Tops my list of cool places in london, especially in the summer..
Monday, 19 May 2008
I have no idea
People often wonder why we are the way we are. The submissive businessman is said to be that way to balance his control at work with his need to switch off. Some say that submissives were abused as children and this is their way of coping. Dominant women are reacting to society's patriarchy. I think that you will find all these examples out there somewhere, but most of the people I know who are sub, dom, swingers or just a bit naughty share very little in common. Overall the sexual trait seems to be unconnected to any other aspect of their personalities.
Forget classifications, either you like having fun that way or not. Do we classify other pleasures? Do we ask why someone loves food, or another loves racing cars, or skiing?
I would say that the nearest thing to a common trait is the drive to enjoy life fully, but even that isnt across the board.
Friday, 4 April 2008
Taking a dump
At no point did I 'take' anything. On reflection I can think of a great many things I would rather 'take'. I don't feel I am unusual in this.
Give perhaps.
Discard for sure.
Excrete.
But not take...
So why? Why do we take a dump?
Musings on a toothbrush holder
So why in gods name do toothbrush holders always come in that 'standard' size that doesn't fit anything made this side of 1985. Some brushes slip right through, other perch precariously by their base angled like a forgotten erection. Some don't fit at all.
Toothbrush holder design, where the 'older gentleman' designer goes to live out his later years. A world where the sun always shines, casting a warm sepia glow across rows of old school toothbrushes.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device
Friday, 21 March 2008
The hero is always pretty.
Ever noticed how the repressed, excluded and 'unattractive' main character of a film is made better and better looking as their popularity and success improves in the films progression. You can predict it almost every time. Its as though filmmakers think that nobody could accept an honestly physically unattractive or even average person as a successful popular human being. Are we all truly so shallow?
It bothers me. I am considered pretty good looking, how much does it bother those who are less attractive! Subliminal hell. You can never be popular as you can never be cute!
I understand it, I know why. But it is still I think a pity.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device