Yes yes i know that you are waiting for my naughty morning after post. It's coming i promise.
A few thoughts.
Sandy and I have butted heads for years. I know relationships have ups and downs but for most of our time together until the last three years ours had very few proper ups. That is to say decent periods of us being happy or feeling in love, and not arguing too much. We loved each other or we would not still be together but we weren't in love. I remember friends talking about going through in love phases of their relationships and feeling sad that we never had them.
That's change. The last three years I have been in love. And the recent hiccups notwithstanding ( see other blog posts) Sandy claims to feel the same way. For example our flirty text messages and conversations are like those of a couple in love. I feel like we are properly in love. This coincides pretty closely with sandy assuming the domme role and I the sub. It had started before that change, but hugely accelerated after. Even now when we argue going back to the d/s dynamic helps us be happy again.
My question is this, are we in love because of it. Is this the way we always should have been but didn't realise or weren't ready for it yet? Am I more happy and in love because I am more fulfilled serving the woman I love? And feeling loved in return?
And if so is this undermining the concept of love, making it part of sex and the dominance dynamic, or is it a fundamental human reaction to fitting into the slot that works well in your little 'tribe' of two.
By the way last night we made love. Sandy was feeling vanilla during the day, it's been months since this last happened. She wondered if it would last, as it happens it did (though I wasn't sure for a while). We cuddle, kissed, played. A had her teased and close to the edge and each time i paused she would melt into my arms, kissing me like a new girlfriend in the throes of early love. I pushed inside her, we made love hugging tightly and came together.
It was wonderful! I love vanilla :)