Sunday, 13 June 2010

Changes, part 2

As I said in a recent post Sandy has been embracing her inner domme. Since a few months back when I asked her to consider if its what she wanted as a lifestyle and if so take it seriously, and she agreed, she has become much much more comfortable with it. Although Ironically due to time and energy we did less dommy stuff for the first month or two after that point, however internally she had been processing and coming to recognise that it really was what she wanted. She likes this lifestyle, she likes feeling cared for and looked after. She loves being in charge! Really likes it when I react quickly to do what she wants, both sexually and more importantly day to day. last but not least she has become much more comfortable with her inner kink, a process that was happening anyway but accelerated in the last few months. She can be very mean when playing, no vanilla in our sex lives anymore!

Anyway this weekend we went to a fetish club. We have been to two in the last two weeks. The first was a club we go to regularly, and other than a long public asswhipping and meeting some cool people there is nothing special to report. This weekend we tried something new, we went to a femdomme club. Only dominant women allowed not dominant men, and most of the subs were men (though not all). It was a friendly sociable place where the focus was very much on the dominant woman. Subs were not allowed on the furniture, nor to partake of the sweets or cakes that were around (unless offered by a woman). So reasonably high protocol. Sandy and I were not sure about it, we dont like the whole up your own backside Big D little s rubbish, nor were we sure about our still nascent d/s relationship. Sandy was mostly cool, I was more uncomfortable as I am still holding on to a little of the whole men arent subby vibe. As it turned out the protocol was very much there, important, fun, and key to the evening, but it wasnt pushed in such a way as to become 'Gorean style' silliness. We had a great time, I spent the entire time either standing around chatting or sitting at Sandys feet rubbing them while she chatted. Did I mention that subs were not allowed to initiate a conversation unless they ask permission and were granted? Even that worked well for us as I can overwhelm a conversation while Sandy tends to pull back (even when I try to stay back and let her lead), its something that makes me a bit sad that i am somehow diminishing her engagement with people. So this way most of the domme women focussed more on her, were very interested in her, and made it easier for me to stay back a little. I chatted also, but it was primarily a domme evening where friendly dominant women socialised in large part with each other while being served by us.

You know what? I really liked the vibe, I liked serving, seeing the women (especially mine) enjoying themselves. I like this aspect of the d/s lifestyle much more than I ever expected.

More importantly Sandy liked it. No she loved it! She really liked meeting normal women who she enjoyed chatting to women who are also dominant. Women who in most cases have kids, husbands, jobs, and are extremely kinky and dominant. We meet so few people on the fetish scene who have a normal outside life or functional relationships. She liked the people, and she also liked being served. She enjoyed me being sat at her feet or getting her drinks, she enjoyed the serving and caring ethos of the evening. She came home full of enjoyment and very relaxed and into her dominant persona. In fact so into it that at 4am when we got home she got online to find her new friends online profiles and stay in touch. She is never that proactive and fast moving when it comes to kinky things, or at least wasnt ever before. Since then she talks differently about dominance in a way that makes me see she really wants it in her life, wants more of it in fact, and likes both the serving and the kinky naughty aspects of it.

We met one lady who is very into trampling (not to mention very beautiful). Not a fetish i have ever had but always keen to try new things. I asked her and Sandy nicely if they minded and she spent 20-30 minutes trampling me and teaching Sandy how to do it right (as in painful, fun but safe). Between them they left my stomach and chest all bruised and marked, which of course I hated every minute of :) I think having tried it that its not something I liked a lot, not something I would ask for often, but fun once in a while. Apart from that we didnt play, just socialised and watched others playing.

As Petal said to me, she had an 'aha' moment.

I need to write about the next morning which was pretty intense and fun play, but no time now



Florida Dom said...

Sounds like you had a good time at the club and will be awaiting your account of the intense play in the morning.


heelsnstocking said...

wow that sounds amazing for both of you, so pleased you both got pleasure from it x another step in the right direction x

Suzanne said...

Sounds like a pretty interesting club. A place like that would interest me for sure!

MissBonnie said...

Sounds like you had an amazing and positive experience. I really liked this post it was a joy to read. I really hope it encourages other new Domme to explore the clubs and events

She really liked meeting normal women who she enjoyed chatting to women who are also dominant. Women who in most cases have kids, husbands, jobs, and are extremely kinky and dominant. We meet so few people on the fetish scene who have a normal outside life or functional relationships

so many women are still caught up in the 'this is weird..or..I have to change who I am for fetish' dogma it was great to see your Mistress discovered we are normal, and was encouraged by it. I often deal with new Dommes who try so hard to portray what they see as 'how a Domme should be' only to find we...a normal outside life or functional relationships.

Best of luck, sounds like it's all going great for you BOTH :)

MyKey said...

Thanks for all the comments!

I will post the play very soon...

Elle said...

Ohhh that sounds like an interesting club! I'd definitely love to visit with BT!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your posts... I'm hoping to rekindle with my Wife, by letting her have Her way more. Great insights into thinking about this, and how to proceed further. :)